prontissimo | labyrinthum inbox

[ One morning, as your character steps out of their home, they are greeted by an owl messenger, bearing a letter. The letter tells them that they have been selected to participate in a gift exchange, and they are to deliver a gift to Di Feisheng by the end of the month. The letter says nothing more, and once the letter is read, the owl will fly away. ]

[ Alberto will find several presents sitting outside his door, wrapped in black wrapping paper with purple bows. The first is a selection of snacks from the local bakery: cookies, pastries, slices, and more. The second is a big squishy parcel, with a comfy blue blanket inside, perfect for winter.

On top is a note in neat, flowing script: happy holidays-- from your secret santa! :) Underneath that is another note, entitling Alberto to a free item should he ever feel like visiting the Flame and Claw forge. ]

Hi, Alberto! I have some information for you about your gift target! In terms of food, he likes sweet, glutinous rice cakes, chocolate covered strawberries, and gingerbread oatmilk chai! apparently he doesn't like sleeping in silence, so something sturdy that provides noises at random intervals would be appreciated. or, if you can find it, anything for, er... "physical advancement."

Not sure about that one. Maybe leave it out.

I hope this helps!

Thank you, Signora!

I think that's plenty to go off of.

[As the holidays ramp up, Alberto will receive a package addressed to both him and Luca both. In it is a notebook with handwritten recipes and instructions. Most of them are local, but a few do come from the various lands that others have come from. They’ve all been painstakingly transcribed by the same hand.

Shortly after, Alberto will also receive a video message on his phone. If he plays it, he’ll be treated to a full video of one (1) Vash the Stampede reciting a whole bunch of space facts!]

[ Willow wasn't surprised to find that Alberto and Luca lived together, and honestly it made things a bit easier for her. In the morning if they step outside, they will find a dried flower wreath hanging on the door, delivered by the mail mice. Attached to the wreath is a tag. ]

To Alberto and Luca,

Happy Holidays!

- Willow

[Like her friend Willow, Luz is unsurprised Luca and Alberto live together! Luz leaves them some sugar cookies and the closest thing to Egg Nog she can make along with this message.

Hey guys! I hope you're adjusting to this place well! Here are some things I found in an antique store. Enjoy!- Love, Luz

For Alberto, Luz found shifting sand sculpture, and a galaxy sculpture globe for Luca!

[On a particular day in early February, the mail mice will deliver a red envelope to Alberto. It's folded to resemble a little pouch, and inside are found eight flower seeds and two lines of calligraphy.]

May the waning year have planted the seeds for good fortune,
And the coming year see flowers bloom all around you.

[Likewise, Alberto's luck is either blessed or cursed by Di Feisheng's easily obligated nature ~~and also he has some questions~~. It doesn't make this less of a terrible idea, but how chaotic can messaging even be.]

I hope your gifts were well matched in generosity. My subordinate thought I was being bribed, so consider them well received.

[ If only Di Feisheng could see Alberto's face light up when he puts two and two together and realizes who's just texted him. He wastes no time in responding. He's genuinely surprised Di Feisheng wrote to him, which, to someone like Alberto, seems maybe more personal than someone more accustomed to modern phones; he's definitely not blowing this chance to talk more with the coolest guy he's met here, though, wow! ~~No evidence for this inexplicable title, of course, those are just his vibes.~~ ]

Glad you liked it, Signore! Your welcome.
Not a bribe of course, HA... Someone just told me that's the kind of stuff you'd want.
Espresso is life-changing, RIGHT?

ô ô
cU°

(^ he's drinking. See it?)

[ ...As if the Christmas card weren't enough of a curse... The kid "draws" over text, too, apparently. ]

["Someone" sure did mention one of those things. Two, even; espresso isn't NOT a tonic of temporary physical advancement, technically. Alberto understood the assignment there, against all odds. A little scary to consider Alberto drinks it on the regular, quite possibly, but maybe explains some things.]

It's certainly powerful, though temperamental. Is it very hard to acquire?

[As for this latest "illustration," it warrants a solid span of contemplation-- regrettable. At least he isn't in it this time. That really was a curse on the entire household.]

I do see it.

No, I got it at the market. There are lots of different kinds too! But ALL of them are powerful haha

[ Well, Di Feisheng passed some sort of litmus test... Alberto's tickled he could recognize the face. That was one of his more experimental "writing-drawings," as he sometimes calls them. He's getting in practice. ]

ò ó
ᵕ d

[Privately Di Feisheng will maintain some skepticism about different kinds and strengths until proven wrong; the relation espresso has to the messes procured by Fang Duobing and favored by Li Lianhua (powerfully evil on an entirely different metric) seems distant at best, easily as disparate as any two grades of tea at least. It wasn't the more important question anyway. ~~Di Feisheng has made it to samsara and it turns out it's suspiciously like hobbies.~~]

Good, then the pot won't go to waste. What about the chocolate spread?

[This little illustration does not require as much scrutiny to decipher, but the simplicity is balanced by Di Feisheng subconsciously emulating the gesture to check his work.]

That one's easy.

Got that at the market too. You can put it on whatever you want. Cornetti, biscotti, bread, fruits... I tried it on pasta. Eh! It was OK.

9 9
–E@ ^

(What about that one?)

[ Di Feisheng brought this on himself... "That one's easy" was a challenge, whether he meant it to be or not. ]

[Hey but was it though. Was it OK. He doesn't need to care about food to know it probably was not.]

It was a good choice. If you find more things like that, I would be indebted to know.

[He really has to learn better about hubris some time. Not this time, but one in the future. It wasn't a challenge deliberately, just kind of as the background noise of Di Feisheng's operating.]

Not easy. Maybe he's being branded.

Oh sure Signore. We love food. And we love to cook! (Well mostly me but my friend helps)

[ Context into this kid's life comes just off-the-cuff like that... but then usually gets quickly swept over in favor of things like this: ]

Also, No. He's eating pasta. (But it's just OK haha!)
It's a fork with noodles twisted on it, See it now?

è é
-E@∆

[It's not entirely clear how some of that is relevant to what he said, but sure. Maybe he also wants to provide cooked food? But the OK noodles...]

Strange way to eat noodles. Could also be a pastry.

Ha! Could be.
You do one!

ò é
˘ d

^(winking)

[Di Feisheng at least is not in fact winking, but having his pastry interpretation validated instills some (misplaced) pride. ~~Qi brunch has been good for something after all.~~]

⼀⻈⺜⺜⺂

^(dao)

[This is. Deeply unnatural. And probably not a good effort.]

Bravissimo, Signore! Nice job

(What's dao?)

[ ...That "nice job" maybe seems less sincere now, but he still means it. In Alberto's book, there's a marginal difference between doing something well and doing it at all. Any job is a good job. Even if it's awful — maybe even especially if it's awful. And considering how Alberto cannot even begin to parse a face out of that attempt, with his very limited knowledge of swords, he's... being really generous with his celebrations, here. But, still, genuine. ]

[It seems they are talking at some kind of cursed cross-purposes. It also seems like some civilization somewhere invented drainage systems just so this kid would have a ditch to spawn in and crawl out of, thereby escaping normal education even more thoroughly than Di Feisheng himself. ~~u dont kno sword? ⚔️? clang clang?~~ Being genuine is wasted here. Di Feisheng is too scandalized.]

One of the four noble weapons. You must know weapons of some kind.

[Surely it will be recognizable now.]

Oh sure. I know lots of weapons.

[ No he doesn't ]

Is it like a harpoon?
Because of ⼀⻈⺜⺜⺂ that part

[ A second text follows quickly after. ]

Wait no!
It's a sword.
⼀⻈⺜⺜⺂
That's the handle thing. Right?

[ Alberto's turn to decipher things... At least whatever ditch he crawled out of afforded him this much knowledge. ]

I had a sword back home. It looked just like that!

[ D-Did it, though...? ]

[Real actual sigh of relief for this second message. He can at least pin it down to a blade weapon and not...a harpoon. Who thinks of a harpoon before even one of the eighteen weapons, much less one of the four? It wasn't that bad a little picture, just too generic to be his dao. As for the rest...somehow even Di Feisheng is having a doubt or three.]

That's the hand guard. I don't need that kind, but nothing else looked right.

Have you tried to get your sword back yet?

[If Di Feisheng knew how to use "suspicion quotes"...]

No, but it's really rusty so its fine. It was good when I needed it back home, I lived on an island, but if I need a sword again here I'd probably get a better one. I just found that one undersea.
I've got lots of knifes now anyway.
c≠≠•===⺂
>°'»'''<

[ There's... so much to unpack between the lines here. The knife and fish emotes are the least confusing parts of this message, probably. ]

[The worst thing is, that isn't a bad representation of a ring pommel dao. The second worst thing is more of a tie scenario. It's true that undersea does have weapons sometimes, though only idiots lose their swords just because they fall in the ocean and die. At least the harpoon makes sense now?]

The sword was for fish? For fighting fish?

HA! No.
I never tried that.
I mostly used it for firewood and to COOK fish...
Fish don't typically put up much of a fight.
(Crabs do though!)

He's beauty. He's grace.

AMAZING hairdo. Way better than mine. HA! Very handsome!

Biscuit is gonna start a trend. I see it now. Soon everyone will want the same kind of wig.

I believe it ahah.
Think Biscuit would like me? I've never actually MET a dog.

Oh, definitely. Biscuit is super friendly and pretty chill until you start throwing a ball. I've been walking him for one of the older patrons of the library.

He can play ball?!
I used to play ball in the piazza back home! But I never played against a dog!

Yeah! He loves fetch and I can throw pretty far. Gives him a good work out.
He probably plays a little different from what you're used to, but it's super fun.

Wait so you just throw a ball and what? He brings it back to you? Can’t he kick it or something? Dogs are big and theyve got 4 legs! I bet they’d be great kickers

Their legs aren't made for kicking very well. Their hinges are all different in the legs.

But yeah! You throw it and they bring it back. Though I guess you could run and they have to chase you to give back the ball for throwing.

Cant they use their tail instead? I used to do that sometimes

I think it depends on the dog. Some of their tails don't really seem like they'd hit anything very well.

They'd also need to be trained, I think.

Do you think Biscuit could learn? I could teach him. HA!

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[ holiday delivery! ]

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12/25ish | Special Delivery

Gift Delivery (backdated 12/25)

Backdated to Christmas!

On lunar new year

text, backdated to c. the Christmas era, un | a.fei

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